She is Better than Me, Dealing with Comparison
Hello, Friends!
You might not like me very much after this post.
I’m going to confess something today and it isn’t pretty. It is a character trait that I wish wasn’t connected with me.
This nastiness is comparison.
For most of my life, I have felt like I didn’t measure up. I wasn’t smart enough, funny enough, serious enough, clever enough, responsible enough, pretty enough, skinny enough, dressed cute enough, productive enough.
Enough, enough, enough-
such an ugly, debilitating word when looking at it from the “lack” side. Feeling this way made me afraid to put myself “out there” when I was younger, and kept me from experiences that would have been beneficial to me.
Or I did participate, but didn’t enjoy the experience like I should have because I hadn’t done it well enough.
Even worse, comparing myself to others as kept me from really enjoying the tasks I feel led to do and who God made me to be. Last year, I confessed my sin of comparison to one of my closest friends. I have been trying to be more aware when I fall into the trap and asking God to help me give it up.
I read Brooke Boon’s post this week and was made aware once again that God isn’t finished with me in this area quite yet.
I know I am not the only one who feels this way, and that is why I am bearing my soul to you.
I say enough is enough. I’m finished with it.
Comparison is the Thief of Joy
- fearfully and wonderfully made
- he created our inmost beings; he knit us together in our mother’s wombs
- he knows when we sit and when we rise
- he perceives our thoughts from afar
- he knows when we go out and when we lie down
- God lavishes us with grace
- We are CHOSEN by GOD.
Kairos- My Redeemer Lives from MICHAEL ELLIS on Vimeo.
These men are locked up because of decisions they made. They don’t have a choice.
Unlocking the Door to Comparison Prison.
I pray that you being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ and to know this love that surpasses knowledge-that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullnesss of God.
Ephesians 3: 17b-19
Edited to Add….. I wrote this blogpost several years ago, and have not revisited it before today. Happily, I can report that God has done a serious work in my heart since I wrote this, and I feel less prone to comparison and much happier just being me! Here is to Holy Spirit transformation. It may not happen as quickly as we would like, but it is happening! I’m feeling so grateful and encouraged.
Don't fret about my not liking you after this post … unfortunately I could have written this myself, so who am I to judge you, my friend. I love this line: If through the shed blood of His Precious Son, God says I am GOOD ENOUGH for Him, shouldn't that make me GOOD ENOUGH for me? and will write it in my Bible so I will be reminded of that truth every day. 😉
Your not alone Susan I do the same, I compare all the time!! Steals my joy
Excellent post!
I like you better after this post 😉 I am the same way, and I try so hard not to be…but I catch myself falling back in to this habit all the time. Thankfully we have a God who is patient to keep working with us and teaching us 🙂
You're not alone, my friend. I compare myself to others almost daily. It's a joy killer and makes me depressed. God made us uniquely to fulfill the purpose He has for us. No one else can do what you do, how you do it! Thank you for sharing your heart!
Hi Susan,
What a heartfelt post! I think we all have some degree of insecurities and feelings of "not good enough" one way or another. I know I do.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, and you're really not alone!
Beautiful Susan! I think this is such an important post for so many women. Thank you for sharing and for the inspiring words! And I wanted to thank you for the book recommendation for my beans!!!
No, you are not alone. It is so easy to fall into the trap of comparing ourselves to others. Your post is beautifully written filled with wisdom from our Lord. Psalm 139 is a favorite of mine 🙂 Thank you for sharing, dear friend! Have a beautiful weekend!
Hugs to you!
Since I have the same problem, I totally agree with every single thing you said.
I want so much to live the way God sees me and not the way I see myself.
Thank you for reminding me of this today.
i think in the times we live in it is especially hard to not play the comparison game
lovely post
brett
We all suffer from this at times but don't often admit it. I am seeing so many girls and young women feeling that they are just not good enough and it breaks my heart. I wrote a post a couple weeks ago "For You" as an inspiration to a couple of my nieces who are struggling with this. Thanks so much for sharing your heart.
Whooee, don't we all do this…horrible.
It has crippled me at times where I wasn't much use to God.
Here is a saying that I love:
"Constantly thinking too little of yourself is STILL constantly thinking of yourself."
I want to help teenagers with some self-image every chance I get…hate for them to feel the way I often did waayyyy back then!
I know how you have felt and agree with you it's time to change. Thank you for this post. It is very inspiring and needed to read it this day!